5 Lessons I Learned From Living With Papi

Just the other day I heard someone groan, “Oh, I sound just like my mother/father.” Have you uttered these words before? This is a fear many of us have yet it’s important to really take an honest look at what it is we fear. Within my life I’ve heard this time and time again and I believe it’s fair to say that most if not all have mommy/daddy issues that cause them to struggle within their personal relationships. Granted our parents (or lack of) greatly impacted our lives as we grew up, especially if we held certain expectations of them or compared them to other parents. Honestly, I used to say the same thing until life circumstances and personal choices brought me back to living with Papi, my dad the man I had emotionally struggled with for many years. So, those daddy issues I had were about to be faced head on and it was my responsibility to identify the tools and resources so I could move forward.

As the youngest child of 3 I tethered most to Papi during my childhood, always feeling as though I was daddy’s little girl. I would always envision us spending time together and craved his attention whenever he was home from a business trip.  Yet that dream was shattered when the childhood home I grew up in was taken by the bank due to a bad business investment my parents took part in. For years I resented and blamed Papi for losing my home (never occurred to me to inquire how he felt about it) and then how he focused more on work than being with his family.

I didn’t realize then that my expectations of my dad and how I wanted him to be clouded my vision of what was reality. I knew in many ways I was very much like my dad, and was also told by others how similar we were in looks. For years, I would become upset whenever someone mentioned our similarities until I decided to look more closely at what characteristics we shared. Since 2014 I have been living with my dad which has been both a blessing and a challenge yet one I appreciate now every day for the lessons I have learned. Just this month I took the next step to move out on my own as we are both more emotionally and physically stable within our personal lives.

As I celebrate Father’s Day I am grateful for the opportunity the universe offered me and to learn how to accept him just as he is. I’ve taken 5 top lessons I’ve learned from Papi, which once drove me crazy yet now I realize how much they have positively influenced me. Most importantly though, the challenges I have faced while living with him from his sometimes egotistical behavior to his negative attitude towards life have encouraged me to focus more on compassion then frustration. After all, being annoyed with him for how he looks and experiences life is my problem and he has chosen how he wants to live his life even if I can’t always understand it.

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I thank him for being one of my teachers in life and am so grateful that he’s still with us today. I love him unconditionally even though I don’t always like or appreciate his actions or words.

5 lessons learned from Papi

1) It’s okay to talk to strangers: For as long as I could remember, I always saw my dad striking a conversation with just about anyone. We could be in the line at the airport, grocery store or eating a meal and he would begin to speak about anything and everything. He was so engaging with everyone. So naturally it was a skill I adapted to as I’ve always engaged with children and adults while traveling, waiting in line or just out and about. I’ve met amazing people by talking about the weather or comment on whatever they had in their hands. Simple conversations sometimes led to long lasting friendships. As a primarily solo traveler it’s been these conversations that have enhanced my trips and encouraged me to withdraw out of my sometimes introverted shell.

2) Delegate: I would always get so annoyed (sometimes still do) with my dad when he would call upon anyone (sometimes various times a day) in our family to help him even with the most simplest tasks. Seriously, I would think to myself as I pounded a nail into the wall or fixed something around the house, why couldn’t you just do it. Recently I learned that he would even pay the neighborhood kids to teach us how to ride our bikes during our childhood. Now instead of getting annoyed I actually marvel at how this man could delegate just about any task that he didn’t want to do and people would say yes. As I became more independent in life I took pride in being able to do just about anything myself yet that has also been a drawback as I would usually do things by myself rather than ask for help. However, I’ve been changing that pattern as I’ve come to recognize that asking for help builds community and shares the responsibility of accomplishing a task. It’s actually so much more humbling to ask for help than to do it on my own all the time. It’s still a work in progress for me but one I’m more aware of thanks to my dad.

3) Family is everything: Since living with my dad I’ve been able to see much more clearly how he shows his love towards his family.Whenever I returned home for long periods of time I would walk on the beach with my dad. We established early morning walks as time for us to talk. This was my chance to ask him questions without distractions. It was during these walks that he shared how he regretted not spending more time with us kids as we were growing up because he was traveling. He admitted that his focus was only to provide for the family. As he’s become older and since my mom passed away I’ve seen a more tender side as he’s been more engaging with his grandchildren. I have come to appreciate how he shows his love for each of us in his own way thus releasing expectations of how I think (or would prefer) he should show it.

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4) Travel to learn cultures: I give credit to my dad for encouraging my gypsy spirit (although I know it’s not one he would take pride in accepting). I could remember traveling on an airplane since I was a little girl to visit family in Puerto Rico or travel to Latin America for a business/family trip. Our trips were about learning new cultures and seeing new sights, which I continue the tradition to this day. Traveling for me has always been a way of life and I am doing all that I can to incorporate it into my business and personal lifestyle. Because of my dad’s joy of traveling with the family I have been able to visit numerous countries and regions growing up and then found new places that I enjoy traveling to. I am grateful and very fortunate to have experienced this because I know many have not.

5) Stay focused: Throughout my life my dad only had employers working as a sales engineer for Latin American countries selling welding and then medical equipment. He began with Hobart Brothers shortly after leaving Cuba while living in Puerto Rico and remained with them for over 20 years until the business was sold. He then took over the company my mom started while I was young, Servitech Corp while she focused on building South Florida Medical Equipment, a family business. He loved selling these products and traveled extensively to share his knowledge with companies around Latin America and the US. His goals were always to provide for his family and stay committed with his tasks at hand. Although my path as an entrepreneur wavers as I figure out all the ins and outs of running my own business, I’m focused on creating a freedom based business that empowers others to release stress naturally. As he was able to stay focused and committed towards his goals in life, which has always empowered me to have goals and objectives within my life.

In summary I am grateful for the opportunity of living with my dad and the challenges I encountered while living there, both personal and professional. I’m grateful that I was able to be present with my mom as she transitioned and then supporting my dad however I could and still do. I’ve learned to view challenges as opportunities with lessons to learn while also taking responsibility for my life and what I can control. I know my dad does not view life in this manner yet that is his choice and I love him unconditionally even though I may not like all of his actions and viewpoints.

If you have been struggling with a relationship with your mom or dad which you know is holding you back in life, then I encourage you today to book a complimentary stress release session with me and share your story. Then we can identify a supportive plan to assist you in releasing your frustrations so you can lead a balanced life towards health and happiness.

Join me every Wednesday at 8:00 am in my Facebook group, Our Wheels of Life, for a new weekly meditation tip to help you feel more balanced within your life through your chakras. Or join my YouTube channel to receive the meditations each week in your email.

 

Feel free to reply to these emails as I’d love to hear from you.

 

Pass this blog along to someone who may benefit from it as we all need love everyday!

Paty, La Mariposa

Join Mariposas Holistic Healing at these upcoming events in Miami.
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Grateful for Mom every day

It wasn’t too long ago that around this time I would be searching online for flowers to send to my mother for mother’s day and a heartfelt card, regardless if I was home or traveling. Now, I stand on the beach where she used to walk and imagine her next to me. My mother passed away in 2014, 3 years after her body battled cancer and chemotherapy. Every day I give thanks that I was by her side when she took her last breath. Every day that she was in the hospital I would give her Reiki to help her body relax.
Reiki, Japanese energy healing technique, has empowered me to be more in tuned with my body and become more sensitive to energy. Usually I feel my mom (and other loved ones who’ve passed) when I sit outside on the beach (or nature). I close my eyes and just breathe. Sometimes I cry and sometimes I smile. Whatever I feel I just allow it to be without judgement as I know it’s my body releasing pent up stress, otherwise known as energy.
Recently, I began to work with a new client who lost an adult child a few years ago and is really struggling. The pain has been intense yet this client is finding hope in various ways, which I support. One of the techniques I will be teaching this person is Reiki as it allows the body to heal naturally by removing blocked energy. I will be teaching my client Reiki remotely, a new opportunity that the universe recently placed in my lap.
In 2013 I became a Reiki teacher as I was on a mission to share this amazing healing technique with whoever wanted to learn. I was inspired by Reiki to help with stress and grief after learning the first level in 2009. Honestly the reason I learned was to help Yoli while she was finding the best way, her choice were natural techniques, to defeat the cancer that was consuming her body. Since then,I have been incorporating it into my life and my profession with a long break after Yoli passed. Yet once I began to understand Reiki the more I embraced being a teacher.
My first Reiki workshop was alongside my friend and yoga instructor, Libby in Costa Rica. It was a successful weekend workshop on a quiet beach on the Costa Rican coast. My parents came as my mother was taking the class and to support me on this endeavor. I had the honor of teaching her Reiki and Libby taught her yoga. It was amazing on so many levels.
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That’s my mom to my right.
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My mom back right. She gave it all. 🙂

To me, Reiki is a spiritual love connection. It doesn’t always offer a direct explanation yet it helps the body to chill so it can heal however that needs to be. It helped me move through my grief whenever I lost a loved one or was struggling through emotional stressors. Now, I’ve created my own reality with a successful healing business so I can continue to serve people in a way that’s unique and beneficial too so many people. I know my mom would be so proud of me. Shoot, I’m super proud of myself. 😉

So this Mother’s Day we (brother, his family, and my dad) will raise a glass of wine in my mother’s honor and celebrate her life. I’ll send her a blessing into the heavens along with a kiss.
This mother’s day give a mother (your mother or any mother you love) a big hug and say thank you for her dedication to ensuring you are fed, taken care of, and loved.
How will you celebrate Mother’s Day this year?
Feel free to reply to these emails as I’d love to hear from you.
Pass this email along to someone who may benefit from it as we all need love everyday!
Paty, La Mariposa
PS. Join me on YouTube Live on May 17 at 7pm as I talk about Reiki; real or woo woo. Click here to join live on May 17.
If you’re in Miami join me for my upcoming Reiki 1 class in English and Español.

Blink and it’s 2017

The final days of 2016 are here. Tomorrow we will be celebrating the onset of 2017 with loved ones, whether humans or furry. However you decide to celebrate it, what counts is how you embrace the new year.

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Lately I have been hearing from so many people how they are looking forward to 2017 so that they can put 2016 behind them. I used to say the same thing until I realized how much I was putting emphasis on the day or year changing than being grateful for what has occurred.  

A few days ago I began to write a list of all I was grateful for in 2016, even the challenges. At first I wrote all that I was happy about; my physical health, my family, my travels, my business, financial gain, and then it got hard. I started to slow down and even cry when I thought of some of the sadness I experienced; anniversaries of loved ones, fears, finding love and losing it gain, frustrations with family, etc. This is part of the process of life. It is impossible to be happy 100% of the time, nor is it healthy.

Taking time to reflect is important even if it’s just a few minutes to identify what you’re grateful for and what struggles you have moved past. I created this handout to help you reflect on 2016 and start creating goals for 2017.

Another tool I learned a couple of years ago is to identify key words for the year. My words for 2017 will be abundant collaborations as I plan to work with other healers in creating amazing online programs and in person workshops to empower you to be the best you can be. So stay tuned!

What will your word or words be for 2017? Reply with your response as I’d love to hear from you.

Pass this blog along to someone who may benefit from it as we all need love everyday!

Paty, La Mariposa
Book a complimentary transformation session with me and let’s discuss your goals for 2017.  I’m here to support you with a step-by-step plan to balance your life, embrace your power, and focus on health.

Dreams and Inspirations Continue

August 13 is a date that will be forever etched in my mind and heart. It’s the day my former partner Joel took his life due to reasons he took with him. Joel suffered for many years due to a traumatic experience he had while serving in the military. We met while in a support group for veterans and dated until I chose to stay in Miami and he returned to his family in Colorado.

My heart weighs heavy with his loss and all those who loved him. His passing has empowered me to continue my healing work as he was very proud. Now he is another person who supports me on the spiritual side which is uplifting.

August also holds another important date for me August 27, the day I leave for a life changing experience to Nicaragua. For 3 months I will be an intern with Natural Doctor’s International and the final month I will be traveling around Nicaragua speaking with other healers. For the past year I have felt guided to take this trip and like many other things I do, I jumped feet first without too much thought because I know there’s a reason.

My goals while in Nicaragua are to improve my skills as a holistic practitioner and counselor through natural healing techniques to reduce stress. During this time I will also be maintaining my business as I continue to work with clients remotely and offering for the first time, Wheels of Life Chakra online course.

What I have learned throughout the losses I have experienced, beginning with my sister passing away 6 years ago, is that I have received so much support and opportunities because I have been more open to them.

All that I do in my professional life, I do with the emphasis that I would be offering these same tools and support to my loved ones who have passed along. I know they would have enjoyed many of the techniques I now practice which have expanded.

I’m excited yet nervous about what my upcoming trip to Nicaragua will bring. I’m thankful to all of you who have supported me in various ways. I look forward to sharing what I learn with you throughout my travels. I will continue to send out weekly newsletters about my work in Nicaragua and inspiration insights for you to also expand on.

Peace and love,
Paty, La Mariposa

My purpose is to empower you on your healing journey and my mission is to offer you health-related insights, practical tips, inspiration, and stories that will support you in living balanced towards a happy and healthy life as you embrace your joy and purpose.

Feel free to reply as I’d love to hear from you. Pass this blog along to someone who may benefit from it as we all need love everyday!

It’s here! It’s here! Finally, my idea has burst out of its cocoon and extended its wings as the Wheels of Life 8 week chakra course.

For 8 weeks, beginning October 2 you will receive detoxes, recipes, information, affirmations, and guided meditations for each chakra so you can balance yourself towards health and happiness. There will be a private Facebook page for those who register and lots of free goodies throughout the course.

Register here and receive a free guided meditationDSC04745.

Join our public Wheels of Life Facebook group for resources, tips, and support until the course begins.

10 tips to boost memory naturally

Introduction

As people approach 50, otherwise known as the half way mark or over the hill, they begin to take more notice of how their bodies and brains are changing. Notable examples could be taking longer to remember information, decrease in energy, physical changes, challenges with motor skills, and emotional capacities to manage life changes. With a bombardment of information coming at us from numerous directions such as our relationships with loved ones and colleagues, the Internet, careers, keeping up with calendars, etc. it can be overwhelming to remember many situations, events, and people.

                  The process of aging begins the moment we are born and our mental ability to process is highly adaptable especially with situations and skills that are “experience-dependent” and is identified as neural plasticity or brain plasticity. Our brain is constantly adapting to our environment and so by maintaining an active lifestyle with activities that focus on cognitive, physical, nutrition, and social aspects this will enable us to continuously learn new skills and refine skills which assists the neurons in our brain to release information and remain active (Cai, Chan, Peng, Yan, 2014).

Cognitive

                  With an increase in cognitive diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Dementia, it’s important to be aware of signs the body shows a consistent decline. Forgetfulness, such as walking into a room and forgetting why or misplacing documents are common, yet when this happens on a more constant basis then it is time to visit the doctor for an evaluation. Just as a person exercises to keep the body in form, so must one exercise new skills at home or work or upholding current practices to ensure the brain can function well (Cai, Chan, Peng, Yan, 2014).

Cognitive Activities

  • Maintain routines Place your important items, such as keys, wallets/purses, important documents, etc. in the same place each time.
  • Self-care techniques to reduce stress, anxiety and depression
  • Life long student. Practice mental and physical activities that encourage thinking and problem solving.
  • Play video games. This encourages brain matter to reform itself. (Cai, Chan, Peng, Yan, 2014).

Physical Activities

  • Restful sleep. Taking a 15-20 minute nap and sleeping 6-8 hours allows your body to repair itself without distractions or stress.
  • Especially aerobic, which increases your heart rate and pumps more blood into your body. Active individuals have are able to process information easier and at a faster rate as it slows down the reduction of brain tissue (Gomez-Pinilla and Hillman, 2013).
  • Maintain an active lifestyle by engaging in physical activities such as cleaning, cooking, being outside, visiting with friends and family.

Nutrition/Diet/Prescriptions

Brain inflammation, otherwise known as oxidative stress, reduces the impact of neurons firing each other, which then cause further deterioration of the body. Constant stress, depression, and anxiety also accelerate the aging process because it causes the brain to remain in fight/flight mode or crisis mode rather than allowing it to relax (Dias et al, 2012).            People can naturally reduce inflammation and promote relaxation by eating foods with polyphenols. These foods have anti-oxidant properties, which protect the brain and aid in mental and emotional health and reduce the onset of cognitive diseases. (Gomez-Pinilla, F., & Nguyen, T. T. J., 2012).

Another important factor is to be aware of medications that may have side effects which may impact memory and motor skills, as well as, interactions between supplements and medications. Always discuss with your doctor if you are taking supplements and learn about the side effects.

Memory Enhancing Foods

  • Green tea
  • Turmeric spice
  • Eat blueberries

Conclusion

Aging gracefully involves a person maintaining an active lifestyle by engaging in cognitive practices that maintain motor skills and for the brain to remain active, exercising, and eating whole foods and spices that help the body reduce inflammation. It is also important to be aware of prescription side effects or interactions caused by supplements. Becoming older should not be a feared state but one of acceptance and enjoyment as one is more knowledgeable and aware of one’s body and mind.

Resources:

Cai, L., Chan, J. S. Y., Yan, J. H., & Peng, K. (2014). Brain plasticity and motor practice in cognitive aging. Frontiers in Aging Neuroscience6, 31. doi:10.3389/fnagi.2014.00031

Dias, G. P., Cavegn, N., Nix, A., do Nascimento Bevilaqua, M. C., Stangl, D., Zainuddin, M. S. A., … Thuret, S. (2012). The Role of Dietary Polyphenols on Adult Hippocampal Neurogenesis: Molecular Mechanisms and Behavioural Effects on Depression and Anxiety. Oxidative Medicine and Cellular Longevity, 2012, 541971. doi:10.1155/2012/541971)

Gomez-Pinilla, F., & Hillman, C. (2013). The Influence of Exercise on Cognitive Abilities. Comprehensive Physiology3(1), 403–428. doi:10.1002/cphy.c110063

Gomez-Pinilla, F., & Nguyen, T. T. J. (2012). Natural mood foods: The actions of polyphenols against psychiatric and cognitive disorders. Nutritional Neuroscience15(3), 127–133. doi:10.1179/1476830511Y.0000000035